They say that laughter is the best medicine, and we’re inclined to agree! Luckily, there’s jokes aplenty out there in theatre-land, from stand-up superstars to cheesy panto banter. Being the geeks we are, we can’t resist a theatre funny or two, so here are a few of our favorite jokes that only theatre nerds would truly understand…
- Two neighbors in Stratford have a dispute about whose house is the authentic birthplace of William Shakespeare. Officials kept the peace by putting a plaque on both their houses.
- A Stage Manager’s View of the World:
The tech crew trips over clearly marked ledges.
Actors trip over tape on the floor.
Dancers trip over tape that was pulled up yesterday.
- How do you drown an actor?
Place a mirror at the bottom of a pool.
- How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?
100 of course! 1 to screw the bulb in and 99 to stand around, saying, “It should be me up there!” and “I could have done it better!”
- How many producers does it take to change a light bulb?
Sorry, a new light bulb isn’t in the budget.
- A sound technician, a lighting designer and a stage manager find an old lamp, backstage at the theatre. One of them gives it a rub, and out wafts a genie! “Since you all found me,” he says, “You each get one wish!”
The sound technician steps up and says, “I wish to be sitting poolside in my own multi-million-dollar mansion!” And POOF, he is gone.
The lighting director takes his turn and says, “Well, I wish to be sitting on the beach on my own multi-billion-dollar private island!” And POOF, he is gone.
The stage manager turns to the genie and says, “I wish to have them both back in 10 minutes.”
- The second funniest part of Macbeth is when the soldiers all cut a branch of a tree to hold in front of them while they march on the castle; pretending to be innocent trees instead of an army.
The funniest part is that it actually works.